Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
