Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
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