Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize