I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize