More tranny stories later!
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I wish they made helmets for livers.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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