I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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