...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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