no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
