So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
