just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
