that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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