I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
