That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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