i barfeds in our rink
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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