We should be called the Road Head Warriors
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
