his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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