My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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