Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
