i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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