i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
