If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
