Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
