i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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