ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I smell like Dick and happiness
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
