some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
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