I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
