thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
