my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
