That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
