ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
