You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
