I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
