I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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