I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Randomize
