I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize