Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
