How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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