She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
