You work out of a Hotel?
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
And then the night went full on bisexual.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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