I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
