Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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