i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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