when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
