I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
