my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
