"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
