google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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