I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
