Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
