We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
