I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
